Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You, translated into business
terms: Market unto others as you would have them market unto you.

What does that mean? Seth Godin, author of New York Times Best Seller "Purple Cow: Transform Your Business by Being Remarkable" (among others), put it this way in an interview with Anthony Tedesco for the 2008 edition of Writer's Market: "Give help, don't ask [for help]." Don't Be a Marketing Moocher

Have you ever been in a relationship with a co-dependent person? How about a serial moocher? Or someone extremely clingy, needy, jealous, or constantly out of cash? You don't like being taken advantage of, do you? It eats at you, even if the person is asking for something you really don't need, or care about, or even value. It's the fact that you're being worked over, played for what you can give, expected to provide even if the other person contributes nothing.

Marketing is a relationship between you and the client. If you promise and don't deliver, you break a trust. If you build expectations and then don't perform, you break a trust. If you hype a product that really isn't worth hyping, you break a trust. If you flash a pretty sign, make a pretty speech, wave around a pretty brochure, and expect money, money, money for that meager show, your marketing relationships will fail. Clients don't like
being worked over, played for what they can give, and expected to buy even if the seller contributes little or nothing. You Gotta Give a Little

We, the sellers, the marketers, must start being the givers in these relationships. Instead of pushing our product, we need to look for ways we can provide to our clients. What skills, resources, talents, know-how do you have that can help someone else get a step up? What can you give away? What can you offer besides a product for sale? Your Cheatin' Heart

People remember how it feels to get cheated. I bought a $20 labeler at Wal-Mart last week. It doesn't work, fresh out of the package. I didn't expect much, but I expected it to work. Now I have to go stand in a line with my two little children, talk to a crabby customer service representative, and hope that they'll either give me a refund or exchange it for a working model. Is it Wal-Mart's fault that the product doesn't work? No, not directly. They don't manufacture or package it; they just distribute it. But it matters. I don't deal with the manufacturer; I deal with Wal-Mart. And I will remember this experience. I will think twice next time. I will wait a little longer, do a little research, and I will go buy what I need somewhere else. Good Vibrations

People also remember how it feels to get more than you pay for. I love going to St. Louis Bread Company, because I can buy my $2 bottomless cup of coffee and my $1 cinnamon raisin bagel (bread sliced with butter, please) and get a lot more than what I've paid for. I get a large, distraction-free space that I don't have to clean up. I get free wireless. I get quiet, anonymity, and a paper to read if I need a break from writing. I get someone to come by and whisk away my tray when I finish my bagel. I get coffee that's hot, cream
that's cold, a clean bathroom, and just enough people around to provide conversation snippets and spur on the next paragraph.

Does this stuff cost them? A little bit, sure. But what do they gain? My loyalty. My good feelings. My happy associations. A guarantee that I will come back, over and over, and that they can burn my bagel, run out of cream, or throw out the newspaper and I will overlook it all. Once a good association is established, it takes a lot to undo it. Same goes for a negative association. Be Like Santa Claus

How does this concept translate to your business? First, stop looking for more ways to sell and start looking for more ways to give. Stop promoting a product and start offering a service. For free. If people are impressed with your service, they'll be impressed with your product. Be a resource center. Learn all you can about areas that relate to your product and provide that information at no cost to clients, potential clients, anyone. Don't ask for
anything in return. Give.

It takes some faith. What if the principle of reciprocity stops working just as you start trying it? It might. I doubt it, though. That 'do unto others' concept has been around for a long time now.

Annie Mueller writes and offers as many services as she can at SisterWisdom.com, where every work at home Mom can build a better life.